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ISSUE 1, NOVEMBER 2019
GOOD MORNING AMERICA
YOUR WEATHER FORECAST
Notes on this Earth and beyond.
May include: a walk in the woods, befriending a Scorpio, environmental concerns, elemental meditations, your worst sunburn.
Notes on the refuse of daily life.
May include: taking out the trash, going mouseless on Excel, refilling your Adderall, an overdue trip to the post office, getting fired, chipping your gel manicure.
Notes on the things we’re sold.
May include: subway ads, that one MILF on QVC, product reviews, the Postmodern premise, your dad’s George Foreman, manifestos, satires therein.
Notes on the body in motion.
May include: the big game, defending Barry Bonds, your least favorite spin class, playing HORSE, deciding if your yoga instructor is gay.
5 O'CLOCK NEWS
Notes on the sensational.
May include: the talk of the town, political musings, really not understanding what’s going on in Venezuela, getting cancelled, world records, meeting Bret Stephens and his lovely wife at their home.
TIME FOR DINNER
Notes on consumption.
May include: eating your boyfriend’s fries, Yelp reviews, going to Weight Watchers with your mom, tipping baristas, recipes, expiration dates.
LATE-NIGHT TALK SHOW
Notes on conversation.
May include: Regis Philbin dressed as Shrek, a scene from your unfinished screenplay, an interview with Sonja Morgan, Abigail’s outburst in The Crucible.
Notes on things of the past.
May include: calling a movie a “cult classic” because you’re the only one that likes it, defending Norman Mailer, Britney Spears’ best worst album, playing truth-or-dare.
VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED
Notes on the erotic.
May include: the last time you used a condom, blind dates, literotica, romantic advice, "Piss Christ," the PornHub comment section, pillowtalk, WebMD symptoms.